I hate gibbons!!! A monkey ate my glasses!!!

Afternoon!

You gotta hear this one, this was hilarious. After a few days of doing not very much at all, besides drink for England, my wife suggested to go and see the elephants at the Elephant Village up the road. So early in the morning we went up to this place which was only a few miles up the road by tuk-tuk. A tuk-tuk is one of those motorised threewheel mopeds that everyone uses to get around. They are dirt cheap and nice and cool as there are no sides to them. When we got to the elephant place it was obvious we were a bit early as all the mahouts (elephant drivers) were still asleep. They all kipped on top of their elephants.

We went for a one hour tour around the hills. It was pretty cool. These elephants walk up 45 degree hills with no bother and it is all pretty smooth going. As it was early the elphant we were on was not quite finished with his breakfast so he kept ripping up clumps of bamboo from the side of the path. This he then crunched as he walked and a few minutes later the thing would fart like hell. All pretty funny. At some point I asked the driver if I could drive the elephant and he said yes and jumped off! Luckily the elephant sortoff followed the guy as I don't know where the throttle or brakes are on an elephant.

After bumbling though the jungle for an hour and crossing a river on the elephant (I aint kidding, the bloody think nearly sank with us on top...) we got back to the stables. We had some free nosh and then had a look around. Somewhere out the back there was a gibbon tied to a tree with a chain. My missus went up there and stroked the bastard. I took some piccies and then I went up to have a look as well. As soon as I was within reach the little &^$&^%cker snatched my glasses of my head.

In the piccie above the bastard is eating my glasses in the top of his tree. I looked for a great big rock to throw at the bugger but after a while someone from the place came with a big stick. I was hoping he was gonna hit the buggery out of the little shit but the gibbon was well aware of this and scooted up even higher into the tree. Then someone else came along with a bit of fruit. Finally the little furball came down and threw my glasses back and ate the pineapple. So if anyone ever asks me for a donation to a 'Save The Gibbon' fund my contribution will be a great big rock! I'm sure we could make a nice coat out of three or four of the little suckers! After that happened I knocked the sightseeing on the head and concentrated on drinking beer, much safer...

Alex.